she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
