your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize
