Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize
