Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
