think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Randomize