i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
