I'm lost and stupid without you.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
