only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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