My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I think people are normalizing furries
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
