Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Randomize
