Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Randomize
