And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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