I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
