Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
