I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
