I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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