what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
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