you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
it glows. i had to have it.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
