Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
