I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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