Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I met the friendliest cop last night
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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