sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
