we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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