Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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