if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
