I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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