he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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