is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
