she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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