This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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