look no pants
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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