It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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