Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
