who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
