your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Randomize
