oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
