just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Who did Billy Mays play for?
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
