Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
