i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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