You're so nebulous sometimes
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
The adults are the big ones right?
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
