I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
You made out with two different species that night
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
