Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
