I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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