your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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