id be glad to
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
