You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
