should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Randomize
