Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future�
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
