Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
