how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
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